Trans and well, stuff.

With all the trans talk and issues I wanted to put some thoughts down. This is prompted by the Prime series I am watching with Cara Delevingne – I first saw her on the “Murders in the Building.” I liked it! Is she Meryl Streep? No, but I was entertained … her series is called “Planet Sex” And I like it … not done watching, but will happily finish it.

One thing I have always been amused at, and sometimes pissed at is people judging “the book by the cover.” A lot of folks categorize me as some right-wing, conservative, knuckle-dragging misogynistic toxic male, And ya know what? I don’t care. I know what I am and looks can be deceiving. I am anything but that.

I am first and foremost a drummer/musician (professional) so I have not spent the entirety of my adult life in a cubicle. Quoting Al PAcino in Scent of a Woman .. “Ive been around!” And compared to a lot of folks I know I am far more open, accepting, progreessing (In the purest sense)  and free-spirited than most. Although the free-spirit thing sometime comes out as “raving lunatic” and that is fine with me cause I am at the core an anarchist and punk and well … yep, a raving lunatic!


I know a great many people – good friends that are pretty much every shade on that gender spectrum. And have had the pleasure of their friendships for years! I love this Planet Sex program and again if you didn’t know me you would be waiting for me to put on a MAGA hat and start screaming about … well, in truth I was screaming. Mostly, at the loudest … “Yeah! You tell em!” and softly, cause –  I am old.. “Well, duh?”

Nothing I have seen in this program has upset me nor made me blush. A drummer… remember? And most of the tales of pro drummers on tour? Yep, true. Been there done that!

My position, in case you asked?

People are born and assigned Male or Female. It makes shit simple. And as I have witnessed some folks do not feel the way society wants then to feel? Not simple. But none of my damn business. And if I may be so bold, non of yours either.

So, everything on that spectrum from Gals I know that are way more masculine than I am and guys I know … well, who are “Gayer than 18 balloons!” and very feminine … they are what they are.

I know folks that have all sorts of feelings and all sorts of different views of who they are. Don’t we all!

First, I think it does sort of revolve around who you are attracted to. Or at least points them in a certain direction. And ya know what? It is NONE of my damn business. And I think … well an old joke “A same sex marriage is way better than a no sex marriage!”

Have I ever been shocked? Honestly? In the sense of this post no, but have been a lot in other areas. For example, someone I know went off on me a while back about these “damn queers!” This is NOT a stupid person in the sense they are educated and read a lot but, yeah … they are something. I hate labels. But that thinking is so foreign to me. And it is wrong. Full stop.

Now I understand the commotion happening and some folks need to get their ya yas out! Hell, today I read about a politician talking about fat-shamming as the same as wearing black face. A stretch, but I cut politician’s slack, cause they are politicians.

Anyway, this was about the movie The Whale (Haven’t seen it?) but the guy who won an Oscar (I believe) wore a costume. A costume. A fat costume. So if we are going to think this way, Johnny Depp wearing a pirate costume is what? Pirate shaming? No, it is acting. It was a movie. Suspend disbelief. Not everything is there for you to be offended. But folks are offended by a lot of stuff – my thinking is they want attention. Everyone wants attention. And Social Media instead of being the wonderful conversations they are supposed to be as outlined in the Cluetrain, they are “Look at me!”  I could write a thesis on the nature of SM – one aspect – look at the comments on say Facebook.

A post about a celebrity passing away .. the comments inevitably are “Oh I saw him in this or that movie!” “I met him in an airport!” and on and on and so on and so forth. Sure it is human nature BUT instead of … “So sorry to hear this. Peace and love.” It is “LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME!!! ME! ME! ME!”

People live lives of quiet desperation ( Paraphrasing: Henry David Thoreau. “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation,”) And SM is perhaps their only outlet.

In the few episodes of Planet Sex, Cara says she had troubles as a kid, “No one understood me.” And “I had no one to talk to.”

I have heard that a lot from friends who are gay, or queer, or lesbian, trans or, or, or … well everything under the sun! A common issue. Why do people NOT listen? And, noodling here … calculating I have a huge number of lesbian friends. Great friends and some I lived with. I have always had a connection with them. No idea why? But I do and I cherish every single one of them and I count as close, trusted and loving friends.

Is this a societal pendulum swing? History repeating itself? Maybe and remembering the 60s (I was there!) all the BS that happened, resulted in some amazing change. Oh, change!!!  I love change! Bring it on! I love the excitement of not knowing what comes next. I have lived my life like a jazz performance, not a symphony! Surprise me!

Folks, people should be able to do whatever they want to do, be whomever they want to be love who they want to love and dress however that desire. And we really shouldn’t get our shorts in a knot over stuff that isn’t our business.

And the header picture? I don’t care. Good on anyone who can make a buck. What has any of that got to do with me? And I could go on and on about the kids on Tik Tok (I love TikTok BTW!) and the drag queen shows and … and … and.but I won’t cause it isn’t any of my business.

So … relax. There is nothing coming over you and do me a favour? If there is a youngster in your family that wants to talk? Talk to them, No sorry … LISTEN to them.

It’s all good. Life is wonderful.














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